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A szóviccblog nem ismer határokat

2008.08.01. 06:37 - hancu

Címkék: angol

Bár a magyar nyelv csodálatosan alkalmas szörnyű szóviccek faragására, az igazi világuralmat csak úgy érhetjük el, ha szembenézünk a globalizáció problémájával, és idegenajkú áldozatoknak is osztunk néhány halálos erejű ökölcsapást, agyra. Bander küldeménye éppen jó lesz az offenzíva megnyitására.

A Panda walks into a Bar, orders a sandwich, and eats it. After the last bite, he draws a gun, shoots the waiter and prepares to leave. The manager comes screaming:
-What do you mean?! You shot my waiter! You didn't pay!
The panda replies
- I'm a panda. Look it up in a dictionary.

Panda: Large, black and white asian mammal. It lives in bamboo forests, and eats shoots and leaves

A bejegyzés trackback címe:

https://szovicc.blog.hu/api/trackback/id/tr35594596

Kommentek:

A hozzászólások a vonatkozó jogszabályok  értelmében felhasználói tartalomnak minősülnek, értük a szolgáltatás technikai  üzemeltetője semmilyen felelősséget nem vállal, azokat nem ellenőrzi. Kifogás esetén forduljon a blog szerkesztőjéhez. Részletek a  Felhasználási feltételekben és az adatvédelmi tájékoztatóban.

Édesapám 2008.08.01. 08:00:51

What said Oedipus's mother before they married?

Don't let the Sun go down on me...

Zsirparaszt/buckalakó tahó 2008.08.01. 08:15:10

Szerintem fotósopp.
(Nem vagyok hajlandó angol szóvicceket értelmezni.)

Panda is tud kopipésztolni 2008.08.01. 08:17:35

A panda walks into a bar, sits down and orders a sandwich. He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun and shoots the bartender in the foot.

As the panda stands up to go, the manager shouts, "Hey! You just shot my bartender and you didn't pay for your sandwich! Who do you think you are?!?"

The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I'm a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager rushes to his dictionary...

"pan*da n. (Ailuropoda melanoleuca) A rare, mountain dwelling mammal of China and Tibet, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves."

Boscorelli 2008.08.01. 08:41:59

Okay All,

Here's another one!

Once, a women went into a shop. The shop assistant ask:
- How can I help you, Miss?
- I want to buy some broccoli!
- I'm sorry ma'am, we have no broccoli.

On the second day, the woman went into the shop again:
- I want to buy some broccoli! - said the woman.
- I'm so sorry, but we still have no broccoli!

The women visited the store on third day:
- Hello, I want to buy some broccoli!
The shop assistant turned to mad:
- Ma'am! Can you please spell dog as is dogma?
- Of course - said the woman - D-O-G!
- And can you spell cat, as catastrophy?
- C-A-T. - said the woman
- Good. And can you please spell fuck as in broccoli?
- Hmmm... there is no fuck in broccoli.
- RIGHT! THAT'S WHAT I MENTIONED! THERE IS NO FUCKIN' BROCCOLI...

Telepi János · http://www.panel.blog.hu 2008.08.01. 08:52:08

Why are the japanese so frightened, when the gardener takes the youngest bonsai into the room?

Because the infant tree is coming.

Smile64 2008.08.01. 09:28:55

No jó, akkor kopipasztázzunk. :)

Why can't a bicycle stand up?
It is two tired.

Two atoms are talking:
"Help, somebody has stolen one of my electrons!"
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, I'm positive!"

What do you call a clairvoyant midget who escaped from prison?
A small medium at large.

pocak 2008.08.01. 10:35:35

'How often do you have elections in Japan?'
'Evely molning.'

dzsedilovag 2008.08.01. 10:37:17

Guy drive his car on road and suddenly he notice a really cool blondy girl is hitchhicking beside the road. Stop the car, girl get in, go.
Than our guy start to gawk at blondy girl. "Wolud you like f*ck with me?" ask her. She smile and "certanly answer nod.
After couple of some nice minute
- Are you finish? guy ask blondy girl. She shake her head. Ok, again.
After some nice minute
- Are you finish? ask again. She shake her head again. Ok... let's get again.
After some not too bad seconds.
- Are you finish yet?
- I'm not finnish, i'm swedish reply blondy girl.

Funkybá 2008.08.01. 11:40:50

- Why is six affraid of seven?
- Because seven ate nine....

danzig 2008.08.01. 11:49:41

- What´s the difference between American beer and having sex in a boat?
- There is no difference: both is fucking near to water

Leonard Zelig 2008.08.01. 12:04:29

Both ARE fucking near to water

Shezar 2008.08.01. 12:57:51

-Where were you born?
-In America
-And whitch part?
-All of me, of course!

lotht 2008.08.05. 08:45:59

My wife went to the Caribbeans.
To Jamaica?
No, she wanted to.

etti 2008.08.05. 11:32:11

she wanted to?
ez nekem már túl magas or I'm nearly not high enough

lotht 2008.08.05. 22:36:35

Hasonlóan hangzanak:
To Jamaica?
Did ya make her?

etti 2008.08.06. 09:23:55

huhh, köszi
egy napig lefoglalt, munka helyett:)

Bicskas 2008.08.08. 01:27:02

a rockrulet bekuldtem, nem raktak ki
süti beállítások módosítása